Stubborn Heart. Joyful Reminder.

As much as I love to process on paper and through writing, I process the most when I run. Especially with people like Sara. She’s a sweet friend. She’s not just a friend, but a part of my small group and also a runner.

We’ve decided our Sunday recovery runs will be a weekly date.

And, it’s wonderful to run and be encouraged. To be real. To be honest. To go far beyond surface level of “I have everything together all the time.” We are messy people, broken without Christ, and discouraged at times.

What I love most about Sara?

She reflects Christ. Anytime I have the pleasure of spending time with Sara, she is joyful. She is a good listener and we relate on a really unique level. We understand each other.

This morning as we ran, I confessed my stubborn heart. 

Doubts about my race.

Doubts about feeling ready.

Nervous to fly to Florida the night before…and come back the day after…

           during staff hiring this week.

Why did I have to get sick?

Why do I have to race?

I’m not ready.

My mom and I talked about my race. I was quick to negate her encouragement. I could feel the frustration build. And, the Lord spoke words of wisdom through my mom, but it was so much easier for me to say, “I know. I know…I know.”

I don’t forget that God gives me strength to race.

I don’t forget to praise him for it.

I don’t forget to enjoy running.

I don’t doubt that I’ll get through, be excited, and race well.

But, as always…

In the back of my mind, there’s a quiet whisper.

“I am God. You are not. I made you a runner, which you have not forgotten. You have, however, forgotten that I desire a pure and joyful heart. Yours is stubborn. So, let me soften it.”

And, while we are talking about Saras…Check out Sara Hall’s post. 

http://ryanandsarahall.com/the-rash-the-knee-and-xc/

I am confident in Christ, so…

I have nothing to worry about.

And, like my mom reminded me, I am incredibly blessed.

Also, this is my dad… (I love him more than I can explain. 🙂

Image

I’ll be writing a post about him soon. 

But, when I think of someone that exemplifies joy in all situations…

He is one of them. 

He’s a source of encouragement, firmly rooted in the Lord, and lives without worry. 

Today, I have been reminded to keep a joyful heart.

 

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